


The Bowler

by tentaclemonster



Series: 100 Fandoms Challenge [55]
Category: Hamtaro - All Media Types
Genre: 100 Fandoms Challenge, Bad Poetry, Crack, Gen, The Author Regrets Everything
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-21
Updated: 2020-02-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:34:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22831858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tentaclemonster/pseuds/tentaclemonster
Summary: A missing scene from Hamtaro: Ham-Hams Unite told in the style of the great hamster poet, Edgar Ratlen Poe.
Relationships: Cappy & Taishou | Boss (Hamtaro)
Series: 100 Fandoms Challenge [55]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1257083
Kudos: 3
Collections: The 100 Multifandom Challenge





	The Bowler

**Author's Note:**

> 055/100 for the 100 Fandoms Challenge. Written for prompt #11 - old.

Once upon a summer's day, in the Clubhouse office,

there sat a hamster name Boss who worked hard and often.

While he sat upon his seat, eager at his chores,

there came a knock-knock-knocking at his office door.

"Pah! I have no time for this!" said Boss, not even looking up. 

"I'm too busy with my chores!" he shouted. "Go away! Shut up!"

The knocking stopped for a time and left old Boss in peace.

The hamster muttered under his breath, "Thank goodness! I'm relieved!"

but Boss' relief was short-lived for after no long time

that knock-knock-knocking came again, louder and more vile.

"Who would interrupt my work?!" said Boss. "Really, who would dare?"

"I won't get up for anyone!" he yelled. "So run along, take care!"

The silence came back again, that blessed lack of sound.

"If I hear a knock again," vowed Boss, "I'll toss the jerk around!"

Quiet prospered for awhile and Boss let himself relax,

but just as he found his groove again, the knocking came back!

Knock knock knock came the sound from behind the office door.

"That's it!" Boss screeched, standing up, "I won't take it! Not once more!"

And so Boss made his way from around his beloved desk

"Let's see who it is that bothers me," said Boss. "Let me face the pest!"

The old hamster moved real slow, but to the door he went.

He affixed to his face a fearsome scowl, no smile -- not a hint!

He grasped the knob on the door and gave it a hefty tug,

and who should he see standing outside but Cappy's frantic mug! 

"Oh, Boss, you're here!" said Cappy. "I am so pleased!

You have to help me out, Boss! I'm a hamster in need!"

Boss' scowl remained for a moment, no forgiveness to impart

before he noticed Cappy's pallor and he had a change of heart.

"What's wrong with you, Cappy?" Boss asked with worry in his voice.

"I know you wouldn't interrupt my work unless you had no choice."

"You're right about that," said Cappy, nodding all the while,

"Something really bad has happened! Something horrible and vile!"

Fear coming over him like a sudden wave of heat,

Boss swallowed heavily and swayed on his feet.

"Tell me what has happened," he begged. "Is it Hamtaro? Bijou?

Is there a cat in the clubhouse? Oh no, what will we do?!"

Cappy shook his head at this and looked very grave.

"It's not anyone else, Boss! It's me! I've been outplayed!

You see, I was in the Ruins and I was having a wonderful time.

I was playing Tack-Q Bowling and that Shogun Wig would've been mine,

but just as I was inching closer to finally getting my prize

I ran out of seeds -- my luck said goodbye!"

Boss stood in the doorway, taking in Cappy's tale.

His fear began to leave him and he could feel his anger swell.

"Are you telling me," he asked, "that you're here for a loan?"

Cappy nodded, his eyes quite wide, and let out a desperate moan.

"Just three will do," begged Cappy, "or maybe six or nine!

I swear, I just need to try once more and that wig will be mine!"

Boss looked at Cappy who pleaded without a blush

and thought to himself quite meanly that Cappy's face should be crushed!

"I have no time for this!" yelled Boss. "Not a single moment! 

I have a whole Clubhouse to run! I can't waste time with all this joking!

I'll tell you this, Cappy, I'll give you not one seed! 

If you want to win that wig, go out and work for what you need!"

Cappy stood there forlornly with tears in his eyes.

His lips quivered and he prayed that Boss would change his mind,

but as it so happened Cappy's prayers went unheard 

for Boss slammed the door shut in his face without another word!

"How dare he interrupt my work!" said Boss, going back to his desk.

"I have so many things to do and he tells me all that mess?"

Boss sat back down in his chair and went back to his chores.

"He needs to stop gambling," thought Boss. "He needs to play no more!

Then he would never think of coming to my door!

A loan, he asked for, and isn't that a shame?

Who would pay three sunflower seeds for a lousy game? Not me, I wouldn't! Not Boss, Not I!

I would rather spend all my days a-working, it's much more civilized!"

And so that summer's day ended with Boss still at his desk

while the frantic Cappy would do no work and would have no rest.

He would go to all his other good hamster friends

and beg them for a few sunflower seeds -- just enough to win!

But would our man Cappy be given what he sought

or would all his desperate begging end up being for naught?

That, dear readers, is a tale for another time,

and I'm afraid the story of Boss has crossed the finish line.

You may delight in knowing that Boss finished his chores

and all without another hamster knocking at his door,

distracting him from his work of the utmost import.

No, not a single knock sounded at Boss' door -- he was interrupted once, but never once more.


End file.
